India 2012 ~ Day 9

Happy Halloween!   There will be no costumes or trick or treating here… Halloween is very much a western holiday.  Here, it’s just plain old October 31.  No big deal.

This morning Shali and I are off in search of a traditional Indian outfit for me to wear to the wedding.  I’m so excited!  Whatever we find, I’m sure it will be simple since I’m definitely not made of money these days but hopefully we’ll find something that will work.  In the states I always struggle to find things that I like that fit well so we shall see.   It was raining pretty steadily but we headed to Commercial Street anyway.

First shop we went into was DCM.  It’s a favorite of Shali’s so we started there.  Shopping in India is a completely different experience.  The entire shop would have fit into a space smaller than my living room but there was merchandise from ceiling to floor and so many colors!  Shop owners/employees are “Johnny on the spot” if you will.  Willing to help you find anything and make you feel like you’re the only person there.  Not really a pressure to buy anything specific or to spend a lot of money, more a feeling of wanting to help you find the thing you will be happiest with.  I’d say I prefer shopping here to shopping in the US.  You never have to look very far to find someone to help you and they always know the answer to your question—if they don’t there’s someone else within arm’s length that does.  And generally speaking they’re all so nice!  

We walked in and Shali told them basically what we were looking for and they pulled out a beautiful peacock green top with bling all over the front.  In the US it would have been considered a dress, it was sleeveless and probably came down to my mid-calf.  I was kind of disappointed when I put it on and there wasn’t enough room for my boobs…  lol  stupid boobs anyway.  The next one I tried on was more to check for size I think, but it was just as gorgeous.  A deep royal purple with green trim and stitching all over it.  The size was perfect, but the bride will be in purple so we started looking for another color.  The next one I tried on was a burn orange color on the top half with kind of a progression to more of a brown at the bottom.  The front piece was completely embroidered with roses and fun designs.  The change in color from top to bottom was actually embroidery; I had thought it was dye work.  The neckline was a light tan color which matched the silk pant.  The orange roses were also embroidered into the pants.  So pretty and fit like a glove top to bottom.  And that’s all she wrote.  We found the perfect outfit at the first shop and we were in and out in less than 30 minutes.  I was AMAZED.  That never happens when I go shopping in the states.  Clearly I need to shop with Shali more often.  LOL 

From DCM we started down the street. Need accessories and shoes… nothing fancy, just earrings and some bangles.  We found earrings in the next shop we stopped in.  Not much of a shop, really.  I don’t even think you could call it a closet… You couldn’t fit two people inside and have both of them turn around at once without knocking things over.  It was all jewelry… earrings, necklaces, bangles and the like.  A few scarves and hair clips but nothing spectacular.  We found a pair of earrings that both Shali and I liked that matched the outfit well… I think we settled on 160Rs ($3.20) for those.  Shali started asking about bangles… we looked and tried a few… my hands are bigger than the average Indian (surprise surprise).  The shop keeper showed us a trick of putting a plastic bag over your hand to make the bangles slip over the biggest part of your hand easier.  We finally found the right size and were asking about colors that would match.  Once we got to the part of price, Shali and the shop keeper haggled a bit and we ended up moving on around the corner to keep looking.  Things went much smoother at the next shop.  I think I ended up paying 80Rs (about $1.60) for 20+ bangles. Not too shabby.  From there we crossed the street to a little shoe shop and found a cute pair of flats with sequins and beads all over.  Not generally my style, but very Indian—which is the whole point, right?  :o)  Shoes = 350Rs ($7).   

Awesome Indian outfit? Check.  Accessories? Check.  Happy wallet? Check.   Overall experience? WIN.

Shopping success achieved, we stopped at KFC to grab some chicken to take home for lunch and we were one our way back to the house.  I think we were gone all of an hour and half or so.  I was impressed.  Back in the states, that kind of a trip would likely have taken me most of the day and I would have easily ended up spending at least 5-6x’s what I did.  I was more than pleased.  :o)

After we ate, it was time to get ready and prep for the evening.  Inika and Suresh had planned a surprise birthday party for Shal (Shali’s sister-in-law) at their in White Field which is very near the Xchanging office.  So, rather than paying for two separate cars (one for Shali to the office in the early afternoon and one to pick me up later in the evening), I went with Shali in the afternoon and stayed in Kaila’s room at the hotel until it was time to leave for the party.  They left the office together and picked me up at about 8:30 and we headed off to the party. 

It had continued to rain all day so the roads were wet and pretty nasty.  It took us a bit to find the house or townhouse, as it were, but we did eventually find it. As we were pulling up to the gate, the car behind us was honking and attempted to go around.  I couldn’t help but laugh when I looked out the window and saw Shal’s face looking quite perplexed to see me looking back at her.  Surprise!!!  LOL  We were actually the first to arrive and we were worried about being late.  With the rain everyone was running behind so the surprise happened there in the driveway.  People came in bringing all kinds of food with them.  Shal is a chef… and many of her friends that came are chefs as well.   Food was amazing!  I had so much fun chatting and getting to know new people.  If I could remember all of their names, I’d mention them… but alas—I fail at that part.  Sorry kids!  Because Shali and Kaila were on “lunch” from work, we pretty much came, ate and ran.  They cut the cake just before we left.  It was made by a friend a Shals, he’s a chef at the Leela (big 5 star hotel in Bangalore).  It was such a pretty cake!  We got to sing happy birthday, give hugs and we were off. 

It was back to the hotel for me and to the office for Shali and Kaila.  I decided to go down to the bar in the hotel and see what was going on.  Being that it’s a western holiday, I figured there would be something going on down there and sitting in the room watching movies was slightly less than entertaining by that point.  I found good music and good people!  Got to hang out with a group of people from an office near Xchanging (Tesco?  I think?  Their specialty is conferencing; tele- web- video- all types).  They’re boss was in town from Ireland and they were having a great time.  I sat to the side for a few minutes just singing along to the music.  Eventually one of the guys came over and grabbed by hand and dragged me out to the dance floor…  We were jamming out to Thriller.  :o)  Thank you Michael Jackson for making my Halloween complete.

Success!  

I just really like this car...  :o)  Also, there was a brand new Mercedes parked right in front of it when  I pulled out the camera, but it pulled away just as I snapped the pic.  Rude.

Random shot of traffic

Awesome gourmet birthday cake!  All of the stuff on the top is fruit and meringue,  the purple band around the outside is white chocolate-- it was SO tasty!

Kaila and Shali workin it at the party

Preparing the cake for candles and singing...  they guy pulling off the gold ribbon made the cake.

Happy Birthday Shal!!  Guy on the left is her husband, Suresh (Shali's brother)

strike a match..

light a candle... 

India 2012 ~ Day 8

Divya comes today!  And I finally get to meet Don!  They are the ones getting married on Friday.  Well, technically they were married last year.  Don’s mother was very ill (cancer) and failing fast.  They were legally/civilly married in her hospital room shortly before she passed in Delhi.  Friday is the party for all of Divya’s family in Bangalore.

They came over to the house about 1 and we chatted and ate lunch.  There is so much going on in preparation for the wedding!  It’s going to be so much fun!  Just like in any other culture there is a lot to do and prepare for… caterers, decorations, flowers, the band, venue, etc, etc, etc.  Mary (Divya’s mother) has been away on a trip with the school she works for so she’s been planning a lot remotely and depending on family and friends here to help tie up loose ends and her nerves are about as thin as the skin of your teeth.  Shali is such a tease… she keeps calling Mary to wreak havoc…  “Mary, guess what’s happened?!” “Aye-oh, what now?” “Nothing. J”  Silly she is. 

Divya and Don came to the house about 1:30, I think.  There were hugs and chatting; last minute conversations about what still needs to be done and updates on changes to the band and a few other things.  Reminded me of several other pre-wedding conversations I’ve had in the last couple of years.  I swear most everyone I know is either getting married or having a baby… I’m just getting more awesome.  J

Got to know Don a little, which was nice.  Divya’s been in Delhi working for CNN IBN.  Don is a musician and works as a producer/jingle guy for a Delhi radio station.  They’re just a very cute couple and I love them both.  Plans for the day had been to spend the afternoon with them out and about starting with lunch.  We ended up having lunch at the house with Mom and Shali and then they came back to pick me up later in the evening for dinner.  We took an auto (autoriksha = little open air taxi).  I might love autos.  They’re fun.  One of those things that I’m sure people here don’t really think about being unique to this part of the world, but they’d be an absolute novelty in the US.  I think top speed is probably about 40 mph—maybe 50mph.  They’re fun little moments.

Dinner was awesome!  We went to Peter’s house (Peter is Divya’s uncle/Mary’s brother).  Peter is an excellent chef and I always look forward to anything that comes from his kitchen… and trust me, I definitely wasn’t disappointed. When I was here 5 years ago, he was the chef at the hotel I stayed at and now is catering freelance from what I understand.  We got a little lost on the way, but eventually found it.  Addresses here don’t necessarily make sense.  I’d never want to be the one driving unless I had an excellent GPS.  So many tiny side streets and alley ways; street signs are a blessing if you can find them and there are so many shops and people all over the place that even when the street signs are there you can’t generally see them as you’re driving along.  Side streets are very narrow, most wouldn’t think there’s actually enough room for two cars to fit through while traveling in opposite directions.  It’s true that sometimes you have to pull to the side and let the other driver have the right of way so you can each get to your destination. Bottom line is that it’s very important to have good directions or a driver who knows the city really well…  LOL  Divya was getting directions from Kavya on the phone as we rode along… I think we were looking for Shine Bakery (we were supposed to turn there) and then turn again at a building that looks like a gym (no gym I’ve ever seen, lol) and then down an alley way to the right and we walked half a block to get there.  I thought the whole thing was rather comical and was thinking about how we give direction in the states.  I have a fairly good sense of direction and it usually doesn’t take me long to get comfortable and find my way around in a new place.  Not here!  There are some roads we drive down that are somewhat familiar but, it would take me a while to figure things out if I lived here.

Anyway—we arrived at Peter’s house and I met Divya’s father (Noah? Noelle? For the life of me I can’t remember his name), hugged Kavya (Divya’s younger sister—I super love that girl), and met Kavya’s boyfriend whose name is also escaping me at the moment, and Irene (a Thai girl who lives with Peter’s family).  Sorry guys!  Don’t be offended… I love you both!  We had fun talking and laughing and joking.  It was a REALLY good time.  I wish I could bring all of them home with me so you could meet them and know how wonderful they are!

The evening’s menu was barbeque… and it was THE most tender yummy amazing beef and chicken you’ve ever eaten in your life.  I wish I had asked him for a recipe… but I’m almost certain it’s one of those things he just has in his head.  The meat was cooked all the way through—not pink at all, but not even the slightest bit dry or tough.  It was absolutely amazing, don’t think I’ve ever had anything like it before and I’m sure I’d be hard pressed to find anything comparable anywhere else.  We were on the rooftop terrace area of the house.  They lit a fire right there in the middle of the floor and we sat around and laughed and joked just like any bonfire/bbq party in the states.  Traditional consumption of food in India happens with the fingers of your right hand.  Bet you never thought of rice as a finger food, did ya?  LOL The meat was cooked in batches on a little grill that couldn’t have been bigger than 12x12 and then passed around on a platter.  We each took a piece, savored its yumminess and waited for the next round—and there were several.  I think we were half done before anyone thought about plates… lol there were also soft rolls and butter.  Meat and bread—I was in heaven.  And then… for dessert…  JAMUNS!!!  Remember how those are my very favoritest yummy dessert thing ever?  I might have eaten 6 or 7… and I didn’t even mind.  They were soooooo tasty. 

After dinner there were hugs all around and then back to Shali’s house.  Such a great evening!  Sincerely wish there was an opportunity to do it again before I leave…  :o(   Definitely looking forward to seeing all of them at the wedding on Friday.

Rooftop bonfire.  WIN.

Don, Divya, Divya's dad, Peter

The view...  house across the street...  lol

Irene, Kavya's boyfriend, Kavya

the bbq

bonfire burning down...

walking back out to the street to catch the taxi home

India 2012 ~ Day 7

Today was a quiet day… not much going on.  I stayed at the hotel with Kaila last night.  I think it was like 2:30 in the morning when we finally got back to White Field, too late for the driver to go another hour+ to take me home.

We got up and had breakfast in the restaurant downstairs.  The Zuri has an amazing buffet set up in a “T” shape along the back of the restaurant.  (I think I’ll be back there for a little while on Monday so I’ll try to remember to take some pictures)  To the right, you have traditional Indian breakfast dishes (they do spicy all day, every day so forget about anything with syrup or sugar) and on the left bacon, sausage, and other side items with a short order cook who will make you pancakes, waffles, French toast and eggs any way you want them.  In the middle there are all manner of breads, pastries and dry cereals.  Then, from the center out into the center of the restaurant a fruit and juice bar.  Everything looked so yummy!  And I’m not gonna lie—it tasted as good as it looked.

Anyway—we had our breakfast then back up to the room for a bit to wait for the driver.  On the way home today I shot some video of the traffic.  I don’t feel like the pictures and videos I took last time really do justice to the wonderfully awesome chaos of it all.  The videos were shot out the side window and had no sound and the pictures only really show what’s a few feet in front or to the side of where ever I was. 

They’re kind of shaky so if you get motion sick easily, might want to watch the shorter ones.  The roads are pretty rough and it seems like there are speed bumps at least every ½ mile or so… probably to discourage speeding… which is just ridiculous because, well… you’ll see…  LOL

OK-- FAIL.  The videos won't load so you're going to have to wait til I get back to the states for that..  Sorry dude.

India 2012 ~ Day 5

And then… today was awesome!  A picture paints a thousand words but I feel like I need five or six thousand to really tell the story, so I’m going to try some new things with links and maps and whatnot so you can link to more info about all the places I went/saw this weekend.  I wish I could have found links for everything, but not every business has a website.  You’ll have to give me some feedback and tell me what you think. Also—there will be lots of pics from this weekend coming later this week.  I’ve taken a bunch with my phone, but because Kaila and Matt are so awesome they are going to share their pics with me as well.  Which makes me real real happy because it’s real real hard to take pictures of myself and get a good view of what’s behind me—possibly because my cuteness consumes the entire frame regardless of how much space in the frame my face actually takes up.  HA!  Ok—moving on.  The weekend--  Ready…  GO!

The morning was fairly uneventful.  I slept until about 8:30ish and then got up and ready. Can I just say that life without a hair dryer is possible, but not necessarily my idea of a good time?  Especially when you have hair as—“independent” and “awesome” as mine. Even with the help of styling products and a hair dryer I never really feel like it looks done, tamed or in any way under control.  Today I waited for it to air dry (which is about as much fun and takes almost as long as waiting for paint to dry) and straightened it with the flat iron—SO glad I thought to bring it with me.  Anyway—all dressed and ready to go I’m sitting in the living room waiting for my ride.  Mom is leaving to run some errands and as she’s leaving she says to me “Have fun, just don’t go and buy up the whole store and then start crying!”  Haha… clearly my last trip was extremely memorable for everyone.  Backstory: I may or may not have spent a ridiculous amount of money at The Cottages and Lakshmi Silks when I was here last. Pretty sure I made their short list of nominees for Customer of the Year.  I wanted to share my trip with EVERYONE and so I bought just about EVERYONE gifts… when I left the store I was pretty sure my boyfriend at the time was going to lose his mind and throw me out when he got the credit card bill.  Poor Divya.  We walked out of the shop and I was so distraught wondering how I was going to explain the bill to Eric that I sat down and started bawling.  She didn’t know what to do with me!  I was a bit of a mess.

Anyway—about 15 minutes after mom left, Bala and Gupreet picked me up at Shali’s house and we headed to UBCity for lunch at Khansama—so yummy!  There we met up with Matt, Kaila, Ganesh, Diana, Gerard, Mahitha, Sukanya, Terrence and a slew of other people whose names are escaping me at the moment (sorry kids).  Ganesh brought his daughter.  She was so cute!  I think she’s about 8 or 9 years old and so stinkin funny—and SO animated!!  Oh my land I wish I’d had a video camera on her most of the time we were there.  The one liners and funny kid moments that came from her were priceless!  She had us all in stitches we were laughing so hard… just adorable!  

Side note:  The Urdu word khansama translated to English means, male cook or chef also assuming the role of house steward.  Not super important information or necessarily relevant but I thought it was interesting.

Aside from lunch with mom, Shal and Inika on Friday, my Indian food intake has been somewhat rationed… which is truly tragic.  Remember how I super-love Indian food with my whole heart?  Still completely true, however—enjoying it in all of its’ authentically yummalicious fantasticality can present a problem for the untrained American digestive tract.  The quality and flavor of the Indian food available in the US pales considerably compared to what is served natively—for obvious reason.  LOL   I would say most Indian restaurants I’ve been to in the US (with the exception of 5^th Element on Baymeadows in Jacksonville) are more North Indian style and very Americanized—milder flavor and creamier sauces.  Natively, flavors and skin tones are mild/fair in the north and get bolder/darker as you come south.  Remember how I tend to be attracted to the extremes in life?  Yah—Indian food is no different.  I like the bold and spicy flavors of real South Indian cuisine!  My stomach and my tongue sometimes fight about it—and I’m not gonna lie… my tongue usually wins, but my stomach doesn’t always ming.  :o)  My last trip may or may not have involved a 2 day stay at Baptist Bangalore, for extreme exhaustion and dehydration…  lol  I still think it was directly caused by the random bleh grey matter yucky moment that George and Murli fed me after Catholic Club.  Bad juju. If I could remember exactly what it was called, I’d add it to a short list of “Don’t EVER” items.  Anyway--after my hospital appearance in 2007 (which by the way, is apparently a great story, because people who I’d never met have heard the story… lol) everyone here has been very attentive to my stomach: “how is your stomach feeling?”, “is there too much of spice?”, “do you need some curd?”, “do you want me to find something more American for you?”, “are you sure it’s ok?”, and my favorite-- “Leeza—drink drink!  You must have more water.”  These truly are some of the most gracious and accommodating people I’ve ever had the good fortune to meet and call friends. 

Outside of Khansama, UB City, Bangalore

Now, back to Khansama.  The buffet was ridiculously yummy.  Mutton, paneer (tofu), murgh (chicken), prawn (shrimp), aloo (potato) and gobi (cauliflower) yumminess-- so many sauces I could never remember then all.  And naan!  Love love love naan.  I could likely make a meal of just that.  Dessert was gulab jamun (of course) and ice cream!  And don’t worry—spice is not limited to savory foods.  I had chilly ice cream for the first time.  Um… can I just say uh-MAY-zing!  It’s orange in color with little red flecks.  When you first put it in your mouth you get what you expect when you’re eating ice cream—that yummy sweet creamy moment of heaven melting in your mouth… and then… a gentle burn in the back of your mouth.  You take another bite and the burn is immediately cooled with that first taste of the next spoonful and then you swallow it starts again, a little spicier this time.  Oh my wonderfulness.  If I hadn’t been so full I would have gone back for a second bowl.  It was amazing.  I’m going to have to see if I can find a recipe online and try making it at home. 

Bala: Good couple!  Me: Oh no u juss dih-nt!  We're so not friends anymore...  lol

Lunch and dessert consumed, we went out to take some pictures of Kaila, Matt and the team.  Just outside the front door of the restaurant there is this awesome bronze of a lion between the host station and the door to the restaurant.  We were joking and laughing, and taking pictures of the a few people.  I go up for my tourist moment and pose all by myself (cuz that’s not awkward or anything) and Bala says—“they make a good couple!”, speaking of me and the lion… such a funny kid.  :oP  I gave him an “oh no u juss dih-nt” face and everyone dissolved in laughter.  Good times!

From Khansama we went to Amoeba, very cool little bowling alley/arcade moment; similar to a small scale version of Latitude 32 or Trafalga.  And we bowled.  Remember how… I have long nails?  And remember how… it hurts real bad when they hit stuff?  And remember how… bowling is less of a sport and more of a spectacle when I’m involved?  Don’t even worry, I did NOT disappoint.  Final score?  63.  I was in rare form… pulled at least one 0 in 9 out of 10 frames.   Almost fell once (with great finesse I might add).  Don’t worry, Bala was filming and caught the almost fall on video.  The story was told and the video shown several times throughout the rest of the night.  LOL

Kaila and me and Amoeba-- how do u like my hat??
I think it was either Bala or Terrence who put it on my head... can't remember... lol

Like a boss!!! I totally dominated the 0's... u'll notice no one has nearly as many as I do... LOL  I'm THAT good.

After Amoeba, we went walking the streets to kill some time before going out for the evening and to see about maybe a little shopping.  We found a guy on the street painting names on grains of rice, which was cool.  Mine says “Liz India 2012”, a dollar well spent.  :o)  Kaila got one with her name and the names of her husband and two daughters (all on one grain of rice).  While we were standing there, a girl came up begging for money.  I told her “no” and tried to brush her off, but she wouldn’t leave.  I’m trying to ignore her and one of the guys tells her to go away.  She finally did after a wicked stink eye moment that seriously looked like she was cursing him. Anyway… we’re walking and laughing and just king of taking in the city.  SO many people in such a small space!  We saw some pretty great stuff.  One of the things I love most about India is the completely contradictory melding of new and old world ways of life and how the come together so seamlessly.  As we’re walking along, we come upon a Van Heusen clothing store.  There’s a crew working outside the front entrance placing or maybe replacing some of the tiles/panes on the front of the store.  The workers were using scaffolding that we might describe as being somewhat medieval. Check out the pic.  Stripped, unfinished poles lashed together… no flat boards to walk on, no safety railing, no harnesses, no hardhats and no ratchet gears to move platforms up and down.  Total old world tools and resources building/improving a completely new world structure.  I guess some things just don’t necessarily need to be improved upon in order to get the job done.

Just past the guy with the rice... wish I had taken a pic of him and his little table. 

Good ol' McD's... you just can't get away from... EVER.

So may people!  I think this is Brigade Road... 

Dear Willis':  Did you know that ur lifestyle is marketed in other countries?  

Old World fixes New World.

We walked probably ½ mile or so down the street and around the corner to Brigade Road and called the driver to come pick up Kaila and Matt (I was riding with Bala).  While we were waiting for the car to arrive, creepy curse girl shows up again.  It was the weirdest thing ever… one minute she wasn’t there and the next, she was.  Just weird.

After the afternoons adventures we headed to I-Bar (can't find a link for this one :-\) for dancing and music and fun!!!  And FUN is exactly what it was!  So many jokes… so much laughing… so much dancing… I’m pretty sure neither Kaila or I stood still for much longer than 45 seconds at any given time during the night.  Of course the bowling video came out more than once during the night and that just made us laugh harder.  The DJ was pretty good and we really did have a great time.  Only problem was when it all stopped rather suddenly and very early.  Apparently there is some random city ordinance requiring nightclubs to stop serving at 11:00 and to close own by 11:30.  Which—I don’t know if you know… but that’s super early… just sayin.  We had been told that I-Bar was able to stay open until 1:00 which is why we had decided to go there.  Anyway, party over (boo) and we all piled into cars and headed home.  I planned to stay the night with Kaila at the hotel in White Field (Zuri) so I piled into their car with her and Matt. 

Yay!  There we are!  L-R Mahitha, Diana, Kaila with me in front.  Good times!!

I sincerely wish I could remember what was so funny...  cuz clearly... it was hilarious... :o) 

That's Kaila on the right... no you're not drunk... she's dancing... lol

We get to the hotel thinking the night is over and what do we find?  A party in the club on the ground floor of the hotel!  Wheeeeeee!! WIN!  We took our bags up to the room and then headed straight back down to the club and continued to dance until 2.  It was awesome. 

With the DJ... cuz we're cool like that... :o)

Upstairs to “sleep fast”…  leaving for Mysore at 7:00am!  Tomorrow is going to be another awesome day!

Buon Anno Nuovo!

Happy New Year!  Ok, so I'm a little late with the celebratory cheer but that shouldn't surprise anyone who knows me... lol


New Years resolutions are lame.  For most of us, we say something like "I'm going to lose 50 lbs this year" and in our minds we really believe that we will.  If your single, you believe that this is the first step to changing everything that is wrong with your life.  Supposedly it will make you more attractive to the opposite sex.  By the way, who decided that "attractive woman" equals a bony size 00 with a shape reminiscent of a standing coat rack?  [*Note: Yes, that's an actual size of clothing for adult women.  Yes, I sometimes want to feed those girls egg salad sandwiches and lard truffles with a sling shot.  Just sayin.]  If you find or know the location of said fashion criminal let me know-- because if they're not already dead, they should be shot for poisoning the minds of the general population and I'm perfectly willing to take aim and fire.  [P.S.  Skinny jeans should be outlawed at the soonest possible moment and violators of said law should be punished to the fullest extent of the law up to and including prison time and even death.  No one is attractive in skinny jeans... NO ONE.  I don't care who you are, how much you weigh, how tall you are or what you look like... STOP IT.]


As a single person you convince yourself that if you accomplish this holy grail of weight loss you will undoubtedly and automatically have countless members of the opposite sex falling all over your new godlike figure.  I mean let's just go ahead and state the obvious here...  you're already an AMAZING person with an IRRESISTIBLE personality and a PHENOMENAL sense of humor-- it's just that no one can see ANY of that through the extra weight, be it 5 lbs or 50.  It's like fog on a window that just won't rub off.  I mean... it's not their fault that they can't see how amazing you are... [Note: everything after 'godlike figure' should be gushing with sarcasm when you say it or it just doesn't have the same effect]  


Once upon a time a very close friend of mine, who I've known more than 25 of my 32 years, actually said that to me once, almost verbatim.  I'm not even lying... it's too ridiculous to make up.  "You know, Liz, you can't really blame guys for not seeing how amazing you are.  If you'd loose all that extra weight you've been carrying around for the last 15 years so they can see that you're as beautiful on the outside as you are on the inside, you'd have men falling all over you.  There's no way they could resist.  I've known you long enough to know you're THAT awesome."  Really?  First: Ru'e! SehKURitee, SEH-kuritee. [for correct pronunciation click here]  Second: at the time I was 28, which apparently means I haven't been physically attractive since I was 13 .  Third: Just for the record, I'd prefer NOT to be married to a man who needs me to be a size 4 or smaller to find me attractive.  The worst part of this ridiculousness is that at the time, I believed him and I would have done anything in my power including "How To" classes for anorexia.  Today I can say this:  Dear Nameless Longtime Friend (who is OBVIOUSLY male),  I can appreciate what you may have been *trying* to say, but you suck at communication.  Stop giving advise to broken and lonely women and take a look in the mirror.  You're not exactly the trimmed & cut all-star athlete you were 15 years ago and your hypocrisy kind makes me sick.  Love, Liz.  P.S. I have a dream.  And in it, something eats you.

At that point in my life I was in the sunset stage of a very psychologically damaging and emotionally abusive relationship.  I was completely desperate to feel real love and attention from someone who valued me as an actually person and wasn't constantly on the lookout for something "better." I was nearly 70 lbs over weight because going out and doing the active things I liked to do that helped me stay in shape caused vile, ridiculous and baseless accusations to be shot at me in rapid fire to which I felt totally defenseless.  So I gave them up to avoid conflict and 'keep the peace'.  I hated myself, what I'd become and everything about me.  


Long story short; In the last 5 years, I have spent thousands of dollars on various diets, exercise programs and medications, both prescribed and OTC to find out that until I fix the inside, the outside really doesn't matter.  Until I fix the inside, I won't have the strength or the discipline to maintain the outside the way I want to be able to maintain it.  And so, this year is about the inside.  I'm going to do the things I want to do because I want to do them, not because I think it will make me more attractive to the opposite sex or cause men to fall all over me and beg for me to become a part of their life.  This is my life.  This is my time.  This is my year to discover what it is that makes me tick.


The moral of this story is that I have decided that this year will be different.  Different means accomplishing the goals I set.  Different means having a purpose.  Different means stepping out of my box.  Different means getting UNcomfortable enough to make things change.  Different means focused.  I have a lot to accomplish this year and I'm already 3 days late in getting started... my hope in sharing this here is that you will cheer for me when I'm successful, encourage me when I struggle and kick me when I need to get back on track.  


If it all happens the way I'm hoping, it's gonna be busy, awesome and TOTALLY EPIC. 


To Do List for 2012:


January:
* Establish healthy habits relating to food, money, writing and spirituality
* Be fanatical about said new habits!
* Buy/barter/create/build additional seating for the living room
* Schedule at least 2 dinner parties at my house
* Enroll in Culinary Arts pre-req classes at UVU


February:
* Sign contracts with 2 roommates
* Trip to Jax for the Highland Games
* Spend at least 2 days at Universal Studios (Harry Potter!) while in Florida
* Schedule at least 2 dinner parties at my house


March:
* Start learning Italian
* Trip to Jax for Mark & Brittany's wedding
* Schedule at least 2 dinner parties at my house
* Start Pampered Chef business with my tax return money???  


April:
* Schedule at least 2 dinner parties at my house


May:
* Visit the Mama, Daddy & Jr at the farm in Texas
* Have $5,000 in savings
* Schedule at least 2 dinner parties at my house


June:
* Trip to Michigan to see Chris, Heather, Shanon & Jaydan
* Schedule at least 2 dinner parties at my house



July:
* Be financially able to completely furnish & decorate the theater room 
* Schedule at least 2 dinner parties at my house


August:
* Have $8,000 in savings
* Schedule at least 2 dinner parties at my house


September:
* Trip to England to visit Joel & Jess and Gilbert & Kath
* Schedule at least 2 dinner parties at my house


October:
* Schedule at least 2 dinner parties at my house


November:
* Trip to India for Divya's wedding
* Schedule at least 2 dinner parties at my house
* Buy a REAL Christmas tree
* Allow Christmas to throw up at my house, because I can


December:
* Schedule at least 2 dinner parties at my house


So... that's the list so far...  is it just me or is there a clear pattern relating to food, fun and travel?  Coincidence?  Probably not.  ;o)  I'm thinking those things are definitely a huge part of who I am.  Never forget the truth of this: Tutte le cose sono possibili. Il potere è mio.


Ready... And... GO!